[Ad Hoc Bookclub] Review with Shakespeare
Jun. 1st, 2016 03:03 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bluegargantuaHey,
So May is over and that means if you've been reading the ad hoc book club selection Sex with Shakespeare by Jillian Keenan, now's the time to talk about it. So I'll talk about it.
The book is partially a memoir of Ms. Keenan's short but very full life and how those events were tied into two central facets of her life, kink (in this case a spanking fetish) and Shakespeare. In particular, she uses the latter to help make some sense of the former.
The first thing that strikes you is how much Ms. Keenan has done. She took a gap year in Spain, went to Stanford, went to Oman, and was a Fullbright scholar among other things and most of that before she was 24. It makes you worry about what you've done with your life.
Anyway, since she has two main lenses to view the world, I'm going to tackle each of them in turn starting with Shakespeare.
Her conceit for Shakespeare is that she often has vivid conversations with the various characters in the plays. At times it seems a bit odd, perhaps like she's having a mental breakdown as the line between fantasy and reality blurs, but I wasn't terribly put off by this and it didn't interfere with her story. The good part about all of this is that she's able to offer some interesting new interpretations of Shakespeare's stories. What makes great literature great is that people can come to it again and again and come away with different impressions. Here, Ms. Keenan tries to show a less misogynist side to Taming of the Shrew and a darker shade to King Lear. I find a lot of her interpretations very interesting though not necessarily compelling in a "this is what Shakespeare meant" kind of way. Still, it makes Shrew more palatable and gives Helena a better motivation so it's thought-provoking in that way.
Now for the sex (or in this case spanking). Perhaps I live in too much of a bubble but I was a little surprised at how difficult it was for Ms. Keenan to figure out her kink and to meet like-minded people. Even in the early 2000's the internet was deep enough that you could pretty easily connect with fellow fetishists or look up reference material discussing the stuff that turned you on. It just seemed that she was extremely unhappy about her fetish for the longest time and I couldn't figure out why the internet had failed her so completely (aside from trying to do a search in Oman of all places).
And, of course, she's fairly young as she's recounting these stories so there's a lot of "oh no, don't do that!" Again, a few basic internet searches could've saved her a lot of grief -- although I'm sure many of my problems might get fixed that way too.
However, the real value of her stories is that they give a real emotional weight and clarity to her fetish and having a fetish in general. The idea that it's not just something you do for fun to spice up sex, it's more or less what sex is. Once she sort of gets things straight in her own head (or straight-ish anyway), she's able to convey that core value of her life in an elegant way.
Overall, I think this was a remarkable book. If you're into the kink/fetish scene I think it's a powerful read and if you're just curious, I think this is a great place to find out more (although I'd encourage you to try a second or third text from someone with a bit more confidence in their kinks).
If you're part of ad hoc bookclub, feel free to leave comments!
later
Tom
So May is over and that means if you've been reading the ad hoc book club selection Sex with Shakespeare by Jillian Keenan, now's the time to talk about it. So I'll talk about it.
The book is partially a memoir of Ms. Keenan's short but very full life and how those events were tied into two central facets of her life, kink (in this case a spanking fetish) and Shakespeare. In particular, she uses the latter to help make some sense of the former.
The first thing that strikes you is how much Ms. Keenan has done. She took a gap year in Spain, went to Stanford, went to Oman, and was a Fullbright scholar among other things and most of that before she was 24. It makes you worry about what you've done with your life.
Anyway, since she has two main lenses to view the world, I'm going to tackle each of them in turn starting with Shakespeare.
Her conceit for Shakespeare is that she often has vivid conversations with the various characters in the plays. At times it seems a bit odd, perhaps like she's having a mental breakdown as the line between fantasy and reality blurs, but I wasn't terribly put off by this and it didn't interfere with her story. The good part about all of this is that she's able to offer some interesting new interpretations of Shakespeare's stories. What makes great literature great is that people can come to it again and again and come away with different impressions. Here, Ms. Keenan tries to show a less misogynist side to Taming of the Shrew and a darker shade to King Lear. I find a lot of her interpretations very interesting though not necessarily compelling in a "this is what Shakespeare meant" kind of way. Still, it makes Shrew more palatable and gives Helena a better motivation so it's thought-provoking in that way.
Now for the sex (or in this case spanking). Perhaps I live in too much of a bubble but I was a little surprised at how difficult it was for Ms. Keenan to figure out her kink and to meet like-minded people. Even in the early 2000's the internet was deep enough that you could pretty easily connect with fellow fetishists or look up reference material discussing the stuff that turned you on. It just seemed that she was extremely unhappy about her fetish for the longest time and I couldn't figure out why the internet had failed her so completely (aside from trying to do a search in Oman of all places).
And, of course, she's fairly young as she's recounting these stories so there's a lot of "oh no, don't do that!" Again, a few basic internet searches could've saved her a lot of grief -- although I'm sure many of my problems might get fixed that way too.
However, the real value of her stories is that they give a real emotional weight and clarity to her fetish and having a fetish in general. The idea that it's not just something you do for fun to spice up sex, it's more or less what sex is. Once she sort of gets things straight in her own head (or straight-ish anyway), she's able to convey that core value of her life in an elegant way.
Overall, I think this was a remarkable book. If you're into the kink/fetish scene I think it's a powerful read and if you're just curious, I think this is a great place to find out more (although I'd encourage you to try a second or third text from someone with a bit more confidence in their kinks).
If you're part of ad hoc bookclub, feel free to leave comments!
later
Tom
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no subject
Date: 2016-06-02 02:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-06-02 04:08 pm (UTC)This book got me thinking (thus a good book for me, by definition) about inherent sexuality. Recently, I read an article about a young man who's discovering that he's got pedophilic tendencies, they're getting stronger, and he doesn't know what to do. He doesn't want to hurt anyone, but doesn't feel that he can safely come out and get the help he needs. (The author interviewed him via chat room.) I thought it was sad and didn't think much more about it until I read Jillian's memoir. She really brought to life, for me, how these things are not optional. Jillian found her place and a partner she can negotiate with, but this is NOT the path available to everyone.
Clearly, my hetero privilege hasn't *really* made me consider this before, and the book really painted a forceful and relatable picture of her desire. And how difficult it is for those who feel they must live in the shadows.
no subject
Date: 2016-06-02 03:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-06-06 07:47 pm (UTC)There are a couple problems with her narrative not to mention the OMG she is SOOO young and she’s a Fulbright scholar, graduate of Stamford, and is a world traveller by 24--wtf am I doing with my life?
Without further ado, here are my thoughts on it--please forgive my tendency to fall to bullet points:
- Isolation is a very relative thing. It's not just about what you have available to you in the way of resources, but also about the comfort level you have. The author grew up in a very uncertain environment. When you are not sure if your parent is going to be a saint or a demon from one moment to the next, it's impossible to be completely comfortable. For me, that translated pretty easily to not being able to seek out support, information or community unless it was dropped in front of her. This is the first book I've read in recent history that demonstrates that.
- The conversations with Shakespeare’s characters started when she was diagnosed with MS. My feeling is that they were more a survival technique than a writing device. It's possible (and probable) that the neat little conversations in the book were a device. However, I have no difficulty believing that similar interactions, conversations or even scenes, did happen. They were probably less organized but none-the-less real.*
- I had trouble buying the idea that abuse wasn't a source of her fetish. She harped on that belief quite a bit before admitting to having been abused. Her idea that we are "hardwired" with a particular fetish, sexuality, what-have-you feels sound and plausible. Yet the strength of her fantasy conversations also felt like she was avoiding real life in general. When she did the reveal my reaction was “duh, tell me something I didn’t know”.*
-The journey that the author takes us on has a lot more to do with shame than pain or love. By the end of the book, I’m not sure she has conquered it. There were a lot of parallels for me and I know I still haven’t completely conquered mine either. (Despite the belief of some people. ;-) Though I have had much greater exposure to the resources available, it is still an ongoing process for me. Even my most recent partners don’t know the extent to which my fantasy life goes.
There are some pretty epic examples of what not to do, but the book evolves because the author did. Towards the end, it seems like she has a much healthier relationship with her fetish and is much more willing to investigate resources. It’s really not a “101” book, but her journey toward a happy relationship with her fetish (and her partner) is informative and something many kinky people can relate to.
When my own explorations were much younger, I might have appreciated it more. Ten to fifteen years ago my patience with her would have been greater and my cynicism much less.
*This is biased-no question. I grew up in a toxic household and suffered abuse-the fantasy conversations in particular are close to home. And I also know this is where a lot of my fetishes come from.